The chisel does an interesting job of chipping blocks of chocolate into usable baking bits, although it not only went through the parchment paper, but also through several layers of junk mail.
Tonight's batch are aptly named Health-defying Chocolate Chunk Cookies, since it has three types of chocolate in the mix: dark European chocolate, dark Ghirardelli chocolate, and organic baking cocoa. The chocolate, since I use quality ingredients in my desserts, costs more than the sum total of material costs for all other ingredients combined. Unbelievable but true, this batch is still slightly cheaper than a batch of rice krispies treats.
I'd still like to try this recipe with an axe. But, I'd need to devise a way for the chocolate to not go flying everywhere when I imagine that I'm beheading despondent postal chickens or foul database processes with said axe.
Yield: 3 1/2 dozen
Material cost: moderate
Mad scientist factor: **
Chunks vs. chips
When Ruth Wakefield first made what are now called chocolate chip cookies, she hacked a chocolate bar to pieces to as a substitution for a chocolate ingredient she lacked. Ooh that rhymes. Anyhow. The cookies should have been called chocolate chunk cookies since she used small chunks of chocolate. Having been recipe-thwarted by people's misunderstandings over what constitutes a chunk vs. how chips are used, I have crafted my own methodology of what chocolate chunk cookies are supposed to be. Daily frustrations at work, like being asked to go hunt down datasets that don't exist in our database from people who know even less about the database than I do, just make me want to beat something to a bloody pulp. I had this creative spark during lunch where it would be neat, if not frighteningly cool, if my roommate were to come home while I was madly hacking blocks of Ghirardelli chocolate to death... with an axe.
I didn't find the axe I was looking for, so alas, I didn't buy an axe tonight. However, I did acquire a 1" chisel and a strange hammer to go with it, which I will be using the hack apart this chocolate. I was quite disappointed that I couldn't find any ice picks. Those would be neat to have in my collection. Snipping apart chocolate with utility shears just doesn't seem right at all.
I want an enchanted chisel. This one is only a meager Craftsman 1d4 chisel.
Kitchen madness
So I have a little obsession with food, epicurian to be exact. No, this is not an inference to sex, but rather the devotion to the pursuit and enjoyment of good food. Thursday nights, it seems, I have spent crafting desserts in my kitchen.
I am still working on the creme bruleé recipe. My last batch came out with the consistency of densely thick soft cheese. It did bake in a water bath, I think the quantity of heavy cream was too much. I started on creme bruleé as a practice mechanism for my latest kitchen toy, a mini torch. The test of a good batch is when the sugar layer of the custard makes the sound of breaking glass with the deft strike of a spoon. I have yet to a) get the sugar to melt evenly, and b) make the custard edible.
Tonight's dessert batch is the oatmeal cookie, with a secret (no wait, I meant to say special) ingredient. Although, I doubt anyone at work will notice. They might if I ever make stollen and bring that in. I try really hard to read and follow instructions, even ones that I wrote myself. But, alas, some deviation occurred while I was madly cackling and mixing ingredients. It all started when I melted the butter entirely instead of softening it. That one step makes a big difference in the consistency of the cookie dough.
Total cook and prep time: 1.5 hours
Yield: 3 dozen
Material cost: low
Btw, one of the most expensive desserts to bake for work is rice krispies treats, by material costs alone. And, it only has three ingredients! So simple, so delicious that I have polished off entire batches by myself. Usually, I eat less than 10% of any batch. Most of it is fed to unsuspecting subjects. (insert mad cackling)
post.script. The raisins were rehydrated in dark rum. That should be interesting flavor.
I am still working on the creme bruleé recipe. My last batch came out with the consistency of densely thick soft cheese. It did bake in a water bath, I think the quantity of heavy cream was too much. I started on creme bruleé as a practice mechanism for my latest kitchen toy, a mini torch. The test of a good batch is when the sugar layer of the custard makes the sound of breaking glass with the deft strike of a spoon. I have yet to a) get the sugar to melt evenly, and b) make the custard edible.
Tonight's dessert batch is the oatmeal cookie, with a secret (no wait, I meant to say special) ingredient. Although, I doubt anyone at work will notice. They might if I ever make stollen and bring that in. I try really hard to read and follow instructions, even ones that I wrote myself. But, alas, some deviation occurred while I was madly cackling and mixing ingredients. It all started when I melted the butter entirely instead of softening it. That one step makes a big difference in the consistency of the cookie dough.
Total cook and prep time: 1.5 hours
Yield: 3 dozen
Material cost: low
Btw, one of the most expensive desserts to bake for work is rice krispies treats, by material costs alone. And, it only has three ingredients! So simple, so delicious that I have polished off entire batches by myself. Usually, I eat less than 10% of any batch. Most of it is fed to unsuspecting subjects. (insert mad cackling)
post.script. The raisins were rehydrated in dark rum. That should be interesting flavor.
Cooking, the mad scientist way
It would be fair to say that I cook primarily from "scratch". This comes from growing up in a household where packaged goods are greatly frowned upon. Not because of the time they would save with food prep, but because they are highly processed, contain too much sodium, or have food colorants and preservatives. I am an omnivore and proud of it. It is my belief that you should experience what nature has to offer at least once, be it picking up something new at the Farmer's Market, cooking a dish that you've never tried before, or eating a cuisine that is foreign to the everyday fare. So let's take quick a step back to before the era of the printing press and recipe books. The art of cooking is a learn-by-doing discipline. Just about everyone can learn it, and some do it far better than others. I'm somewhere in between those two groups. My passion comes from developing and making recipes that suit my palate needs and various food allergies. I certainly know a lot about food and what I like to eat. Let's just say that my stomach is happiest when I make frequent, daily sacrifices to it.
The Foodening
This blog's name comes from a food reference in the Invader Zim episode #23 - "The Frycook What Came from All That Space".
Here is the episode transcript on Fandom:
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